10 years from now

Currently, I'm staying in Loma Linda for the next 4 days with my friend Emily. When I woke up this morning Emily had left bags of groceries with yogurt, coffee and bananas before she ran to one of her many jobs. After I read a little bit from Henri Nouwen's book, Lifesigns, and a quick shower I followed directions from my cell phone to my newly-wedded friends, Ashley and Nolan's, house. Spent the morning chatting with Ash about life as a housewife, then went with her to pick-up her hubby, Nolan,  from class for lunch and they shared some wonderful left-over rice and curry with me. I love spending time with my married friends, watching them interact and love each other is such a wonder to me. Also, it's crazy to think that kids are the next step for them. After lunch I spent the afternoon catching up with a long lost friend, Pamela. The last time I was in Redlands area I stayed with her for another friend's wedding, whom I plan on catching up with later this week. Being here and seeing these friends in their settled lives, going to school, working, married, bathing the dog, making meals for the family, I feel so unsettled. I have no plan. I'm still figuring out who I am, what I want to do with my life, who I want to spend it with, where I want to settle (but, I do know that Southern California is not my calling). There's a lot of decisions quickly approaching, and a lot of the time I don't feel good enough, strong enough, or smart enough to make these decisions for me. I've been reminding a friend lately that she doesn't need to worry about decisions, let God do His work. He'll do what's best. And here I am, stressing about something so insane, like what I'll be doing in 10 years on a long weekend.