Showing posts from November, 2011

Can't sleep ...

I'm not too sure what I've been doing lately. Obviously not unpacking. It's always the last thing I do after a trip. I don't complain about much and I'll do almost anything, but I hate unpacking. Besides, I'm bound to have to pack it all back up and move again soon enough. 

Leaving for Argentina in 4 weeks. I'll be back the end of Feb. then gone again to India for a month ... maybe this is why I like living out of a suitcase. It's just too fun to settle down. But I would really like to crawl into my bed tonight and curl up in those flannel sheets. Mm, mm.


A few years ago I was told about a group of students from the University, the CC and Whitman who had formed an organized group called Network for Young Walla Walla. A few people I knew, who I highly respected and admired, were quite involved and encouraged me to come to the weekend gathering at the CC. They met for dinner friday with a short introduction, discussion groups Saturday, and group sharing on Sunday. The goal was to rally students from the surrounding colleges who care about their city, want to get involved and make a positive impact in the community, whether it be through education, environmental issues, city council meetings, public transportation - the hot topic at the time. I remember accidentally finding myself in a discussion group for political involvement in the community. The conversations in the small room were far above me. My brain was hurting from scrambling to find definitions for their language. I remember feeling so stupid. So naive. A lack of class. Uneduca…

Insecure at Last, A Political Memoir

Insecure at Last, A Political Memoir by Eve Ensler

I just recently finished this book by Eve Ensler, a Political Memoir allotted to the governments movements, or lack thereof, to provide the promised security to all peoples. Ensler writes in her introduction that we are a nation striving for security. She says, "In fact, security is essentially elusive, impossible. We all die. We all get sick. We all get old. People leave us. People surprise us. People change us. Nothing is secure. And this is the good news. But only if you are not seeking security as the point of your life.
      When security is paramount you can't travel very far outside a certain circle. You can't allow too many conflicting ideas into your mind at one time, as they might confuse you or challenge you. You can't open yourself to new experiences, new people, and new ways of doing things. They might take you off course. You can't know who you are; it's more secure to cling to hard-matter identi…


This week I've serendipitously come across several quotes, verses, educational philosophies, articles, song lyrics, and so on with a similar message. 

One quote by President Woodrow Wilson that I found in my journal from years past: 
We grow great by dreams. All big men are dreamers. They see things in the soft haze of a spring day or in the red fire of a long winter's evening. Some of us let these great dreams die, but others nourish and protect them; nurse them through bad days till they bring them to the sunshine and light which comes always to those who sincerely hope that their dreams will come true.
Another song by Casting Crowns that's played on the radio every time I get in the car:
Where are you, men of courage?
You were made for so much more
Let the pounding of our hearts cry
We will serve the Lord
Because we were made to be courageous
I've got some dreams ... crazy dreams, passionate dreams. They're fun to talk about with people that support and encourage my drea…

One-Eyed Cat

We saw Sara Groves in concert this weekend and Jenny & Tyler are touring with her. They're a young couple with so much passion. Check out their music. Super awesome!

One-Eyed Cat

you gave up your one-eyed cat, still makes you sad, but i'm allergic
you gave up trips to the beach, you used to go every week to get some surfing
you cut back on a daily routine of chocolate ice cream and three french presses
you gave up playing solo gigs to sing with me, we sound much better

i didn't mind much giving it up, cause i got even more of you...

honey, know i meant it when i said i do
long as i'm alive i'll fancy you
and our love may not look much like hollywood's
but i'll love you with all my heart 

Faint Not 

the problem’s not a gun, not a color, not a hundred dollar bill
we think the struggle can be won with simple thoughts like 'come together be good willed'
the gap between the rich and poor is spreading out all the more or so they say
we ignore the claims

o my soul, fa…

Big Bed

It's a make-a-bed-in-the-living-room kind of Sabbath. I'm cold and tired, relaxed and fulfilled. So I got home from potluck, changed into my lounge wear, turned on the electric heater, started the tea pot, lit a couple candles, drug my comforters and pillows off the bed and now I'm sprawled out on the living room floor. Listening to hymns, reading, and listening to Sara Groves' new album director's cut edition (a super cute dialogue between her and her husband about her songs) in preparation for her big concert tomorrow night with my best friend Emily. Ah, it's so nice to be at peace. Sabbath is the only way I can survive school some weeks. Ah ...

Under the Bed

I have a twin bed in my room now since my sister moved in and we share the small room, it can barely fit the two of us. I do appreciate her company even though sometimes it's a little crowded. I have a queen sized comforter over the top of my twin bed and it drapes down all the way to the floor allowing for a conveniently, secretive storage area underneath. With 1-2 hours of personal time between 7am and 7:30 pm every day, the easiest way to keep a clean house is to shove what is "out there" to "under there." I like a clean house, when things are in disarray I'm annoyed, irritated, angry or anxious even. But instead of validating my first and foremost response, I nullify what I'm thinking, "yeah it makes me mad, but ... I can easily pile it under the bed, then it's fine" or "I wanna fix this now and get it out of the way, but nobody cares, I'm the only one, just shove it under there" or "Today my computer crashed and I l…

Real Power

I've tried to stand my ground
I've tried to understand
but I can't seem to find my way

like water on the sand
or grasping at the wind
I keep on falling short

please be my strength
I don't have anymore

I'm looking for a place
that I can plant my faith
one thing I know for sure

I cannot create it
I cannot sustain it
It’s Your love that’s captured me

Please be my strength...

at my final breath
I hope that I can say
I've fought the good fight of faith

I pray your glory shines
through this doubting heart of mine
so my world would know that You
You are my strength
Last night I walked down to the beach and sat on a giant log where I get the best phone service here to talk with a dear friend. This deep and truly significant friendship to me has developed rather quickly over the past month or two through bible studies and tough life stuff. Last night we talked for an hour about our mighty and powerful God, who gives big signs directing us in big intersections of life. I remembered a …

Wind, blow me to Rosario!

The wind is keeping me up tonight. Her force and power make me feel so tense and out of control. She blows things where she wants them, the leaves have no say. The plastic lawn chairs are thrown across the patio into the fence without any sympathy. Her fierce whistle hurts my ears and sounds like the school bell signaling a class change. The speed of her chilly breeze simply mirrors my Wednesday like a film in fast-forward. I'm exhausted, but stiff in attempt to resist her. This weekend I'm taking a trip to Rosario on the Washington coast. It's going to be a relaxing weekend. Which starts Thursday night since I have no classes Friday. I'm going to read, journal and rest, hopefully make some new friends, too. Whew... get me out of this crazy wind!