Back to good, no, just old WW...

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I've been back in Walla Walla for 1 week now and what an experience it's been. I love it and loathe it all at the same time, never knew it was possible to feel both emotions so strongly at one time. It's good to be back home to a place I recognize. I love the family feeling of this small town and enjoy seeing old friends and making new ones. I enjoy working with awesome kids at the Jr. Academy in Milton Freewater where I spend more than 15 hours a week. I love reconnecting with returning SM's and celebrating our universal confusions about returning to Walla Walla. I loathe the feelings of worry and anxiety that overwhelm me as I walk down the sidewalk. The fear of failure that retorts from years past and seems to haunt me everywhere I go. The feeling that nobody understands and that I walk alone. I feel exhausted after a day of interaction with people I haven't seen in over a year and it makes me want to curl up in bed and never go outside again, and when I do see someone I haven't seen in that length of time I quickly turn around and walk in avoidance. Today I read a verse that gave me hope...

"Day and night I'll stick with God. I've got a good thing going and I'm not letting go. I'm happy from the inside out-- and from the outside in, I'm firmly formed."

Psalms 16:8,9

I'm excited that God is going to stick with me day and night, no matter what happens here. I'm ready for a new year back in Good, yes, good old WW.

Comments

  1. TaraBSeptember 25, 2009 at 12:54 PM

    That text is awesome Teens. Those feelings that you're having, that means that there's growth and change happening. Embrace it, and know that you're going to find your place and passion soon enough. I'll pray for you friend. Returning to the old is always hard when you feel so new.

    love you miss you

    Tara

    ReplyDelete
  2. HillarySeptember 30, 2009 at 4:11 AM

    KV and Tina,

    Your blog was beautiful. Thank you for taking something stressful and overwhelming and making it passionate and loving. God is good :) WE LOVE YOU AND MISS YOU! We became a follower so we can keep up with your life.
    Love,
    Kati and LM

    ReplyDelete

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